Mindful Leadership in Schools: A Quick Friday Afternoon Reflection

In school leadership, our strength doesn’t lie in controlling others—it lies in shaping how others experience us through our responses.

School leadership is full of decisions, conversations, and competing demands. In the rush of each day, it’s easy to slip into reactivity. Someone speaks out of turn. A parent offers unfair criticism. A colleague fails to meet expectations. And the same question arises:

Can we control how others treat us?

The short answer is no. Not directly. People act from their own experiences, pressures, and beliefs. Their behaviour reflects their world, not ours.

But here’s the deeper insight: we shape how people experience us by how we respond.

• Respond with calm, and we reduce friction.
• Respond with clarity, and we reset expectations.
• Respond with compassion, and we build connection.
• Respond with strength, and we hold boundaries.

This is the real work of school leadership. It’s not about control. It’s about creating a climate where respect, trust, and growth can take root because we model those behaviours ourselves.

We teach, even when we’re not teaching. We influence not just through position, but through presence.

And so, here’s a quiet leadership challenge for the weekend:

If we can’t control how others treat us, what kind of treatment do our responses make more likely?

It’s a question worth asking not only as leaders, but as colleagues, educators, and people.

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Dr Jake Madden

I’m Jake Madden (Dip Teach; B.Ed; Grad Dip: Leadership; M. Ed: Leadership; EdD; FACEL; MACE), and I’ve had the privilege of working in education for over thirty years as a teacher and principal. Throughout my career, I’ve focused on supporting teachers to build their capacity, developing learning approaches that respond to the needs of today’s world, creating flexible learning spaces for 21st-century learners, and designing curriculum that encourages global mindedness. I’m particularly passionate about the concept of teacher-as-researcher, and I’ve been fortunate to contribute to this area by sharing my experiences through books and journal articles. My work reflects what I’ve learned from leading and navigating educational change, and I’m always eager to continue learning from others in the field.

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Author: Dr Jake Madden

I’m Jake Madden (Dip Teach; B.Ed; Grad Dip: Leadership; M. Ed: Leadership; EdD; FACEL; MACE), and I’ve had the privilege of working in education for over thirty years as a teacher and principal. Throughout my career, I’ve focused on supporting teachers to build their capacity, developing learning approaches that respond to the needs of today’s world, creating flexible learning spaces for 21st-century learners, and designing curriculum that encourages global mindedness. I’m particularly passionate about the concept of teacher-as-researcher, and I’ve been fortunate to contribute to this area by sharing my experiences through books and journal articles. My work reflects what I’ve learned from leading and navigating educational change, and I’m always eager to continue learning from others in the field. View all posts by Dr Jake Madden